Videos

Your 4-Minute Guide to ALL 32 TEAMS at the 2018 World Cup

Transcript

00:00
good morning Hank it’s Tuesday every
00:01
four years the 32 best men’s national
00:03
soccer teams gather together for the
00:05
World Cup which is played in whatever
00:07
country has most successfully bribed
00:09
FIFA officials it’s the most watched
00:11
sporting event in the world and the
00:12
United States won’t be there here’s an
00:15
introduction to the 32 nations that will
00:17
Argentina have Lionel Messi arguably the
00:19
best player never to win the World Cup
00:21
Australia’s national team are called the
00:23
soccer ruse which makes them hard to
00:24
dislike Belgium have Argyle in their
00:26
uniforms so they’ll probably win the
00:28
tournament Brazil are consistently a joy
00:30
to watch except when they are playing
00:31
Germany and they’re the favourites to
00:33
win the World Cup this year Colombia’s
00:34
jerseys look like they have an armpit
00:36
sweat pattern but I will not let that
00:37
distract me from the extraordinary good
00:39
looks of their star player hummus’
00:40
Rodriguez Costa Rica just passed the
00:42
United States and life expectancy in
00:43
addition to beating us twice in World
00:45
Cup qualifying so that’s nice for them
00:46
Croatia are notable for having a
00:48
chessboard on their uniform Denmark
00:50
invented Lego so that makes them fun to
00:52
root for Egypt has qualified for their
00:54
first World Cup since 1990 and they are
00:56
led by noted hero and dreamboat Mohamed
00:58
Salah and their goalkeeper is 45 years
01:01
old which is a real inspiration to old
01:03
people like me all in all they are my
01:06
adopted team for the World Cup England
01:08
right so the deal with England is that
01:10
every World Cup all the fans are like
01:11
our team isn’t even that good we
01:13
probably won’t even make the
01:14
quarterfinals and then they do make the
01:15
quarterfinals whereupon they lose and
01:17
all the fans are shocked and devastated
01:19
that their national team did exactly
01:21
what it always does
01:23
Francis mascot is a rooster also they’re
01:25
a trendy pick to win the World Cup this
01:26
year but they couldn’t beat the United
01:28
States and a friendly over the weekend
01:29
so I’m a bit dubious Germany are very
01:32
good and they have a manager who always
01:33
looks like an aging beetle trying to
01:35
hail a cab
01:35
Iceland qualified for the World Cup
01:37
despite having a population smaller than
01:39
Wichita Kansas how are we not going to
01:42
the World Cup I’m sorry that is off
01:43
topic congratulations to Iceland who
01:45
would be a great pick for my adopted
01:47
team if it weren’t for my undying love
01:48
for Mohamed Salah Iran’s backup
01:50
goalkeeper slept on the floor of the
01:52
pizza restaurant where he worked until
01:54
signing a professional contract a few
01:56
years ago almost all of Japan’s players
01:57
play professionally for Japanese teams
01:59
which is why it’s no excuse to say MLS
02:01
isn’t good enough to develop World Cup
02:03
level players Mexico are obviously the
02:05
best team in North America also they
02:07
have Rafa Marquez who will be playing in
02:09
his fifth World Cup Morocco have a very
02:11
strong defense which they will need a
02:13
Spain and Portugal Nigeria meanwhile
02:15
have the best kits in the tournament and
02:16
if they weren’t in the hardest group
02:18
they might go far but they are in the
02:20
hardest group Panama have qualified for
02:22
their first World Cup ever which is
02:23
great and I am totally over the fact
02:25
that they beat the United States in
02:27
qualifying how do you lose to Trinidad
02:29
my friend the writer Daniel our tacomas
02:30
Peruvian and their uniform has a sash
02:32
and they’ve qualified for their first
02:34
World Cup since 1982 making them an
02:36
excellent choice for your adopted team
02:39
until and unless you look into these
02:41
dreamy eyes Poland are a good long shot
02:43
picked to go far in the tournament if
02:45
their star striker Robert Levin dusky is
02:47
informed Portugal have Cristiano Rinaldo
02:48
if you’re into that kind of thing I’m
02:50
sorry I’m trying to work my way through
02:51
some of my issues around Real Madrid
02:53
right now Russia is hosting the
02:55
tournament and I’m not gonna say
02:56
anything else because I am genuinely
02:57
scared of Vladimir Putin Saudi Arabia
02:59
are the biggest underdogs Serbia has a
03:01
defense with tons of experience or put
03:04
another way they’re old nobody agrees
03:06
with me but I think Senegal could go to
03:07
the semi-finals because Saudi Amane is
03:09
really good and know this video has not
03:12
been biased by my affection for
03:13
Liverpool
03:14
South Korea’s coach is only four years
03:16
older than Egypt’s goalkeeper Spain are
03:18
kind of the Yankees of soccer Sweden no
03:21
longer has football’s biggest
03:22
personalities Latin ibrahimovic so why
03:24
bother
03:25
Switzerland specializes in neutrality
03:27
which is perhaps why they play so many
03:28
excruciating ly boring nil nil draws
03:31
Tunisia’s kits look so good I bought one
03:33
but I fear their World Cup will be brief
03:35
and last but not least Uruguay are
03:36
probably best known for having a striker
03:38
Luis Suarez who has bitten opponents on
03:40
three separate occasions but that
03:42
ignores the important fact that in more
03:44
than 99% of his competitive games Luis
03:46
Suarez hasn’t bitten anyone a nearly
03:49
perfect record I’ll be live-tweeting
03:51
every game of this year’s World Cup at
03:53
my sports twitter at sports with John I
03:55
hope to see you there
03:56
Hank I will see you on Friday

Related posts

How To Choose A Running Shoe | What Are The Best Shoes For You?

Admin

The Rules of Basketball – EXPLAINED!

Admin

A Beginner’s Guide to American Football | NFL

Admin